life advice

Making the Most of Now

It Scares me….

Have you ever looked back and wished you’d taken that trip or finally tried that new hobby?
How do you know if you like something if you’ve never tried it?
What on earth are you waiting for?

Why do people wait until they are ‘retired’ to travel. I don’t know… I think it’s backwards and an unbalanced way of living. All too often, we hear heartbreaking stories of people’s carefully planned lives being ~~cut short~~ by illness, accidents, or other unforeseen circumstances. This begs the question: why wait for the “magical” retirement age of 65 to experience life? Why not start now?

I would think I’m a pretty out there person, squeezing in a lot of things, but I still think I have ways to go in fully committing. Upon realizing this, I’ve been all in for trying to get a solid job at a large multinational so I can expat around the world, trying new things and cultures. I see it as a part-time travel job with work to sustain the adventure. “Work to live, not live to work”.

From my first international trip back when I was ~19 years old, I realized how eye-opening and open the world can be. I probably didn’t (and still don’t) fully appreciate or endorse it all, but I know the opportunity is there. Trying new things and putting yourself out there. That’s why I am moving overseas – to live life in the fast lane, try new things, and most of all – to have no regrets.

Fired up! Get Some Go About ya!

So cool, I know I want to do something… But what is it and how am I going to make it happen?
1) Planning. As any good Finance person will tell you, success starts with planning. “If you fail to plan,you plan to fail”.
2) Execute: Make it happen. I’m not a humble guy… So I’m just going to say it, I’m good at this. I make things happen. I put plans on shared calendars, I book far ahead, I work through fatigue. YO to the LO.
3) Enjoying the moment and reflecting. An area I need to work on. Sometimes I’m too caught in 1 and 2 that it interferes with the moment.

My 2024 Travel Planning Map

Progressing Through Life in Stages

I’ve been meaning to write this post for a while now and glad that I hadn’t rushed it, I have taken an interest into Philosophy and Psychology which has been a fun and fruitful venture! A few things have really stuck with me; Carl Jung’s Four Stage of Life and also his quote;

‘People measure you for what you do, not what you say you’ll do”

Ross' Perspective on Carl Jung's Four Stages of Life

Carl Jung's Four Stages of Life:

The Athlete: In this stage, which usually corresponds to youth, individuals are focused on physical development, competition, and establishing their identities. They seek to build their skills, explore their interests, and strive for success in various domains.
The Warrior: This stage typically occurs in middle age. During the warrior stage, people often channel their energy towards career, family, and societal responsibilities. They aim to establish themselves in their chosen paths, protect their loved ones, and contribute to their communities.
The Statement: As individuals move into later adulthood, they enter the stage of the statement. Here, people tend to reflect on their accomplishments and contributions. They may focus on passing down their wisdom, sharing their life experiences, and leaving a meaningful legacy.
The Spirit: This final stage is often associated with old age and the approach of mortality. People in this stage may become more contemplative, seeking to understand deeper spiritual and existential questions. They may detach from worldly concerns and concentrate on personal growth and spiritual exploration.

Favourite Quotes

“Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”
“People measure you for what you do, not what you say you’ll do”
“I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.”

“If you fail to plan, you plan to fail.” – Benjamin Franklin.

I originally titled this ‘The Importance of Plans and Goals’, then realised that without a goal, there’s no need to plan.

But then what is a goal and why do we need them? To me a goal is about understanding. Understanding ourselves, our wants, society, family, etc. To set a goal we first want to understand WHY we want to achieve the goal. Most of the time this will be subconsciously known to us but it’s always best to know The Why and the Goal.

We need goals to give life direction, meaning and progress. Too often when asking people ‘What did you do on the weekend?’ you will get the lacklustre reply ‘ah, not much’ or ‘just chill’. Firstly, if that was my goal – to chill and do nothing, then 100% fine. But if you sit on your couch watching the Olympics or an amazing documentary thinking ‘How amazing, I wish I could do that’, then you need to ask yourself the hard questions:

What is your purpose?
What makes you happy?
What gets you out of bed each day?

Although not a necessity, I would recommend first, understanding yourself (The Why), then building your Goals and then The Plan to achieve those goals.

Looks like a lot if going on… Start from the left.

What gets you out of bed, then;
Link these to goals, and then;
Set a plan to achieve these goals

I find the more connections you can make between your joys and what gets you out of bed, the more strongly a goal will resonate with you.

Example: Goal: Ultra-Trail du Mont_Blanc

The Why (what I get out of bed for):
- Love for mountains, nature and scenery
- Love for Travel – chance at a French-Swiss Adventure
- Running (can) give me a euphoric ‘high’ during and a sense of accomplishment after
- To challenge myself – A few years ago, if you told me that someone ran 170kms with ~10K elevation change, I would say it’s impossible. Those people are heroes. I want to be a hero. Maybe part god complex part egotism part conceited but I like to challenge myself to do things most people wouldn’t dare or chance upon themselves to accomplish. A paradox which could be written on my tombstone – Ross ‘The Humblest’ Michell.
Goal: I want to run the Ultra-Trail du Mont-Blanc (a 170km mountain race in the Swiss-French alps with one of the largest fields).
The Plan: like all of my big goals, planning starts with a Google Sheet.
- Research the course (Length: 170K, Elevation: 10K, Cut off: 46h 30m). How on earth will I do this?
  - Research: running, types, podcasts, coaches, travel and course map.
  - Set up a training plan
  - Find and hire a coach
- Timing – Yearly in August
- How to Qualify: 10 ITRA points in a maximum of 2 races. Which races will I do…. This basically turned into it’s own adventure
- Convince the wife to allow and support me

Most importantly, writing these things down can help you as your go. It sure helps me when I write these articles.

Happy Planning!

Unless you understand this formula, time is fixed, it’s something you can’t get back.

As a kid we grow up with these expectations which almost don’t allow for questioning: go to school, get a job, find a partner, buy a house with a white picket fence, have a baby, become a grandparent, done. It seems like a question everyone has answered without even asking themselves of something so vitally important.

These 5 questions are the ones I believe are most crucial in thinking about how you want to spend your time without mindlessly following the masses.

Do I really want to be a parent?
Relationship
Do I need to buy a house?
Career / Money
Why am I alive? If I retired today, what would I do?

I don’t always take the most orthodox approach to life and that’s purely due to asking myself questions and tossing up the opportunity cost (considering all options) in terms of time and selecting the best option.

1. Do I really want to be a parent?

Yes or No? I believe this is the most important question that people really need to ask themselves. If you get this terribly wrong not only can you severely alter your own quality of life, but also the next generation’s life.

Just like anything involving decisions and opportunity costs, I would recommend making your own table of pros and cons. I generally start with the cons.

Cons

Time commitment
Short temper / lack of patience
Cost to the environment
Cost to my wallet

Pros

Live vicariously through your kids
Can bring a lot of joy
Naturally paternal / maternal
Give you something to do

For some it will be clear after putting a simple list together. For others, more research may be needed. Luckily for me, I have 2 brothers with 3 kids each. A simple visit to each house gave me solid insight into the life of being a parent.

Personally, the time commitment was the killer for me. I like my life, I like spending time on me, I do what I want (which is what the wife also wants). If a kid came into my life, almost all of my time for the foreseeable 18 years would go into that kid away from me. Yes, I’m selfish but that’s how I want to live MY life, your life is your choice. Communication is also key, talk through these things with your partner before you get married or get too deep.

Remember your life is crafted by your own choices, be inquisitive and know how you want to spend your time to live the life you want to live.

2. Is this the right relationship for me?

What kind of relationship am I looking for?
Why am I with this person?
Do I want to get married?

Firstly be honest with yourself and then communicate and be clear with your partner. Know what kind of relationship you want: is it just fun? Serious? Nothing? It’s up to you. Pick one and be clear, there is nothing worse than being in the ‘grey zone’ – keep it black or white.

If you are lying to yourself and your partner, you are wasting 2 people’s time and effort.

3. Do I need to buy a house?

In Australia it seems like another rhetorical question… But why do we want to be house owners? Just to be clear, I’m not against buying a house, I just think it’s most important to consider your situation and timing in relation to buying. I’ve listed some pros and cons below.

Buying

The Cons of Buying: It’s a big commitment of money, but responsibility as well. It may also lock down your options for working hours, holidays and other commitments whilst putting further stress on the purchaser.

The Pros of Buying: You are an owner – you can do almost whatever you want with the place, you have a secure place to live so no one can really kick you out. The price of the house (most likely) will rise in value – so you can make money on the purchase.

Renting

Pros of Renting: Cheaper initial cost and little upfront investment (bond), freedom to move places if you don’t like the location or house. If you go on an extended holiday, you will pay no rent (i.e you can literally move anywhere in the world).

Cons of Renting: Can be forced to move out of home. Rent increases are inevitable. You will be ‘paying for someone’s mortgage’ (although I don’t believe this to be any different to being employed).

My wife and I purchased an apartment in Sydney in 2019. We both actually love the apartment & amenities as well as the location (closeness to shopping, national parks, safety, etc). We have seen so many benefits in terms of tax, rental income and getting experimental on the tools. Doubts about the purchase have only recently come to mind as we plan out the next few years in a post-covid world where we would like to work and live internationally and having a large asset back in Sydney is a bit of an obligation.

4. How much money is enough?

This is almost the same as when can I retire? Do I need to keep working until I’m at retirement age? I want to challenge the thinking here – especially to those who are not planning on kids. An idea which I autonomously thought of but which is well documented by Bill Perkins is below:

What’s your optimum retirement strategy? Are you going to just keep working long hours in order to sock away more and more money that you’ll never get around to spending because you’re working?

The Die With Zero philosophy is once you’ve saved enough to fund your retirement and give to your family and charities, you should start focusing more on generating memorable life experiences. That’s the time to live life to its fullest, not to be pulling even longer hours in the office, or waiting until you’re too old to be able to enjoy doing things.
https://summaries.com/blog/die-with-zero

In the end, how much help do you need to give to your kids? If you’ve raised them to be self-sufficient, I’m sure they will be okay on their own or with just a little support. You’ve worked hard to earn this money, go enjoy your money and don’t end up with a James and Lily Potter amount of money left over without being able to spend and enjoy it.

5. What is MY life?

Imagine a life without having to worry about time or money or anything else. What would you do? What do you enjoy? Where do you WANT to spend your time?

This is how I like to think about ‘the meaning of life’ – my meaning is to enjoy life with the people I care about. Is there another life? No idea, but what I do know is I will live now and die one day and I will enjoy the hell out of it.

Have a good solid think and figure out the things you love to do which bring joy to your life. For me this is:

Life planning
- Short Term: Planning my next few days, next holiday, mapping a new trail run / bike ride, blog writing etc
- Long Term: Exploring google maps for holidays, Expense / qantas point planning, investigating long holidays, blog planning, etc
Travel
Running / Hiking / Nature
Anime, gaming and computers
Collecting (cards) and creative hobbies

If I were to retire tomorrow I would honestly be up until at least 3am ‘life planning’, I call it. Which would just be on my custom build PC throwing ideas on a spreadsheet in timeline format and tossing up ideas of which one sounds best and works best with my current situation and timings. No doubt those plans would include each of these dot points. The next morning I would run the wife through these plans and see if she’d be keen on them – that is my/our life and I love it.

I never had planned to build a website let alone do it. Every year (for the last maybe 10 years) I’ve set my goals or as most people know them new years resolutions within the start of January. This year was like any other where i had them split into long and short.

Placeholder link – writing goals

On there for 2021 was the usual get fit, Run this, start that, etc. Only after I started chasing on of them – running events did my goal expand into this beast of starting a website and blog.

See the quote above from one of my favourite Anime: Hunter x Hunter 2011. “You should enjoy the little detours to the fullest. Because that’s where you’ll find the things more important than what you want”. I understand this as, even though you may have goals, sometimes the side tracks are where you really find meaning to the goals.

It all came about as I was training for my link: 50k ultra first lumberjack, where mid-way into a 40K run I thought this is amazing, I want to:
1. Notes for my own records
2. Share my learnings with a wider audience and hope to inspire

For me personally, when you’re out there running for up to 6 hours alone with a flat set of earphones, you have a lot of time to thing (Link to: Japan Bike Tour). So many things are going through your mind but there’s no way to write them all down.

For me personally, I want to be able to look back at my life and easily see what I’ve done. Not dissimilar to a diary or scrapbook but in a digital and interactive format. I want to see my triumphs, failures and stagnations. Learn from this and go forward.

Leading into the 2nd part, when listing all of these learning, why not share the learnings I have with a wider audience. I always thought things like the school curriculum and life lessons you learn to be almost irrelevant in shaping someone into a future success. Hopefully my way of living “live the life you want to live / live your own life / You are accountable for your own happiness” will inspire others to seek better in their own lives. My wife has taken this own board and just (as of 20/04/2021) posted her newest PB for a park run 29 minutes which she largely attributes to my enthusiasm for running and other hobbies motivating her to get out there.

Finding this website as a detour on my life path has inspired me to further mature and pass on whatever wisdom I can.